Oh, look out world, watch me fly!
I sing, I dance, I read Proust
I’m such a versatile guy
It’s such a great ego boost
My book’s wide open, turn a page
Just don’t shout, Get him off the stage
I’m not a flash in the pan
I’m overflowin’ with spunk
I’ll play the Elephant Man
‘Cuz I was born in a trunk.
All of this, my friends, to assuage
You don’t shout, Get him off the stage
I’ve got The Biz in my blood, my life is endless transfusions
And when I fall on my face I just get minor contusions
Because the world of the theater is the world of illusions
I can’t finish this thought because I’ve got no conclusions.
I’ll do some songs and some bits
I’m just a Scott-of-all-trades
And I will throw spastic fits
Unless you throw accolades
I should be making triple wage
Elevate me . . . Modulate me
I’ve got some tricks up my sleeve
(It’s acrylic and cotton)
And if you don’t believe
I’m imbecilic and rotten
You’ll have no cause to shout in rage
Get him off the stage!
